How does social status anxiety affect me and how can I overcome it?

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This article, Status Anxiety, explores the causes and solutions to social status anxiety. It specifically analyzes anxiety stemming from expectations of equality and uncertainty about the future, and suggests ways to alleviate it through philosophical value judgments and artistic approaches.

 

My motivation for reading Status Anxiety

I read this book when I was transitioning out of student status and moving from the consumer to the producer class in society. I came across this book at a time when I needed to become financially independent, design my own life, and strive to live a happy life. As a fresh-faced young adult preparing for a new start, I was excited to look on the bright side of social life and dream of being able to do whatever I set my mind to. However, there was also a vague sense of anxiety, like someone who has to go to a new place he hasn’t been to yet. The anxiety stemmed from the fact that the deadly element of money was hovering nearby, and the competition in the society was unparalleled. The idea that the process of enduring such competition would bring various stresses and anguish unlike anything I had ever experienced before made me anxious. Then, I remembered a book called Status Anxiety, which was once a best-seller. I read it casually at the time, but when I reread it recently, I deeply understood the various factors and solutions to anxiety that I hadn’t realized at the time. This book made me want to crystallize my vague feelings of anxiety and organize the solutions in my own logic.

 

Causes of Anxiety

This book analyzes the various causes of anxiety in the modern world and offers solutions from different perspectives. As in his other book, Essays in Love, Alain de Botton takes a direct, point-by-point approach, rather than a metaphorical, back-and-forth approach. In that respect, it was easy to understand even for me, who doesn’t like ambiguous issues. The book begins by defining ‘status’, a prerequisite for anxiety, and the anxiety it causes. The author then presents the causes and solutions to anxiety, extracting them from various books he has read and formulating them in his own logic. The book is organized in such a way that readers can take the parts that resonate with them and move on to the parts that are difficult to relate to in a way that makes them think, “I guess this is possible. For this reason, I think it’s important to analyze your own anxiety in order to be able to effectively take in the book’s message.
The section of the book that caught my attention was “Anxiety Stemming from Expectations of Equality”. The book shows a pictogram of five people of the same height, and explains that if one of them is taller, the other four will feel relative dissatisfaction and jealousy. The idea is that people set up a reference group of friends and family who are similar to them as a benchmark for happiness, and if they don’t measure up, they feel very anxious. In particular, people expect to be treated equally within that group, and the feeling of relative deprivation when that expectation is betrayed is cited as one of the main things that makes individuals anxious.
One of the sources of anxiety that many people will experience is “uncertainty” about the future. The book cites the fickle nature of talent, luck, the employer and his interests, and the global economy as examples of factors that are difficult to overcome through individual effort alone. Whereas the anxiety that comes from expectations of equality is something that can be addressed within the individual, this uncertainty is an external source of anxiety that is beyond the individual’s control. People can be betrayed at any time by the talent they’ve put their faith in, and they can feel jealous when a lucky coworker gets a promotion. You can also become a victim of a new company policy following a sudden downturn in the global economy. These external factors, which occur regardless of our own efforts, are the source of anxiety, which manifests itself as the fear that no matter how hard we work, we may not be rewarded for our efforts.

 

How to deal with anxiety

As I read this book, I tried to find my own solutions to anxiety. First, I took a cue from the book’s chapters on philosophy and overcoming weaknesses as a way to address the anxiety that comes from expectations of equality. The idea is that you can mitigate the source of your anxiety by establishing a value judgment standard based on your own distinct philosophy. The most devastating anxiety, when the expectation of equality is betrayed, comes from the eyes of others. The anxiety of being seen as lesser than others stems from the worry that others will think so. So, when determining your value, you shouldn’t rely solely on what others think of you, but also consider your own value judgment. Of course, this requires a certain amount of brashness and confidence, and developing the skills to support it is essential. However, it’s not always easy to make these self-judgments in social life, so you’ll also need to be able to admit and accept the consequences in a clean way.
Second, to address the anxiety that comes from uncertainty about the future, I considered using the “arts” suggested in the book. Quoting Matthew Arnold, the author describes art as “a critique of life,” and artworks as “the result of a process of understanding life. Appreciating and feeling art can give us a perspective that allows us to understand the world more authentically, and this can provide a foundation for addressing anxiety in our lives.
But it’s not just about appreciating art or music. This is not a solution that works for everyone in terms of accessibility and cost, so we need to broaden the scope of art. If we define art as “an activity that gives us a perspective on life,” then our personal hobbies can be considered a form of art. For example, rock climbing is an activity that allows me to experience the process of overcoming difficulties to achieve a goal. This process is similar to overcoming the challenges we face in life.

 

About the author

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Hello! Welcome to Polyglottist. This blog is for anyone who loves Korean culture, whether it's K-pop, Korean movies, dramas, travel, or anything else. Let's explore and enjoy Korean culture together!

About the blog owner

Hello! Welcome to Polyglottist. This blog is for anyone who loves Korean culture, whether it’s K-pop, Korean movies, dramas, travel, or anything else. Let’s explore and enjoy Korean culture together!